Its Wednesday again. I weighed in and it sucked again. Ever since I went back to school 3 weeks ago I have not lost but have put weight back on. Couple of things I contribute this to are the fact I am in class many hours and working 2 jobs. I am also studying my butt off trying to do well. Times that I would usually hit the gym are now busy studying or so tired I am trying to catch up on sleep. I am very mad at my-self right now. Before I started back to college I told my self I could not let school do this to me. Leah the Weight Watcher leader and I talk a little bit about habits I have noticed since being back in school. One is when I am studying and feeling tired I eat something to try and keep my self going. Wrong answer. I am going to try and get up move around a little. I will keep healthy snacks by me when studying. Another bad habit is I am not working out as much I feel overwhelmed. Amanda and I talked tonight and set a weekly goal for me this week. I have to work out 4 day this week and loose 3 pounds. On the days I do not work out I will eat only 34 points, I am allotted 44 points a day for my size, sorry if it does not make sense to non Weight Watcher people. Overall for the month of September I have to loose 15 pounds for September and make 4 work out every week. We will see how this goes.....

As for school my progress towards becoming a RN feels like it is moving very slow. In the nursing core classes we just finished the OB unit and take our first test next week. The other nursing core class called Pro-topics we are working in a group writing up a major semester long case study. Statistics is going well I have to study a lot but thats ok. I enjoy my instructor I have taken a class with her before and she is awesome. First test is next week too. My speech class is taught by one of my high school advisers. Mr. Scott is a great guy. It is only week 3 and I have had to talk in front of the class every week. Not only is my public speaking improving, but my self confidence is receiving a boost to. Tomorrow night I have to give a presentation on my career. This should be fun. Over all doing well in school right now.

Week 1 initial weigh in 422 lbs
Week 2 weight: 416.4 lbs down 5.6
Week 3 Weight: 416.2 lbs down 5.8
Week 4 Weight: 410 lbs down 12
Week 5 Weight: 405 lbs down 17
Week 6 Weight 403.8 lbs down 18.2
Week 7 Weight 396 lbs down
8 Weight 389.8 lbs down 32.2
Week 9 Weight 392.6 lbs up 2.8 loss 29.4
Week 10 Weight 388.8 lbs down 33.2
Week 11 Weight 383.6 lbs down 38.4
Week 12 Weight 383 lbs down 39
Week 13 Free pass
Week 14 Weight 376.4 lbs down 45.6
Week 15 Weight 376.4 lbs down 45.6 at least I didn't gain
Week 16 Weight 375.0 lbs down 47.0 it's moving
Week 17 Weight 377.4 lbs down 44.6 wrong way damn
Week 18 Weight 384.4 lbs down 37.6 what the hell?
Week 19 Weight 370.6 lbs down 51.4 made up over 50 lbs done yahoo!
Week 20 Weight 368.4 lbs down 53.6
Week 21 Weight 373.6 lbs down 48.4 wrong way, need to make an U-turn
Week 22 Weight 378.0 lbs down 44.0 my u-turn became 360 heading same way Help!

Well I would like to quote a song by Darryl Worley "It sounds like life to me." Thats what has happened to me for the last few weeks. Since I ran the 5k 2 weeks ago I have only worked out once. I've lost my energy. I have not been eating well. I missed weigh in last week because of work this week I'm up 5 pounds (SH*T). I am also working 2 jobs and back in college full time finishing up my RN. I just feel like I am out of control right now. I need a U-turn. I have been talking with some people today one gentleman told me "when you fall down the steps you do not say well I fell and keep rolling to the bottom. No you stop your self and start walking back up again." I can not let a little stumble stop me.

On a happy note tommorow August 27th marks Amanda's and my first date. I can not believe it has been fours years since August 27th 2005. Its been the greatest four years. I look forward to many more. I love you with all my heart. Buckle your seat belt it will be bumpy ride from here, but thats ok because I know your the seat next me. I raise my glass and say "to the lamp of love: may it burn brightest in the darkest hours and never flicker in the winds of trial." I will always love you, plus one.



Week 1 initial weigh in 422 lbs
Week 2 weight: 416.4 lbs down 5.6
Week 3 Weight: 416.2 lbs down 5.8
Week 4 Weight: 410 lbs down 12
Week 5 Weight: 405 lbs down 17
Week 6 Weight 403.8 lbs down 18.2
Week 7 Weight 396 lbs down 26
Week 8 Weight 389.8 lbs down 32.2
Week 9 Weight 392.6 lbs up 2.8 loss 29.4
Week 10 Weight 388.8 lbs down 33.2
Week 11 Weight 383.6 lbs down 38.4
Week 12 Weight 383 lbs down 39
Week 13 Free pass
Week 14 Weight 376.4 lbs down 45.6
Week 15 Weight 376.4 lbs down 45.6 at least I didn't gain
Week 16 Weight 375.0 lbs down 47.0 it's moving
Week 17 Weight 377.4 lbs down 44.6 wrong way damn
Week 18 Weight 384.4 lbs down 37.6 what the hell?
Week 19 Weight 370.6 lbs down 51.4 made up over 50 lbs done yahoo!
Week 20 Weight 368.4 lbs down 53.6
Week 21 Weight 373.6 lbs down 48.4 wrong way, need to make an U-turn

So I have missed about 5 weeks of posting. Well I've updated my running log at the bottom of the posting. As you may see I had a hard 5 weeks. The scale barely moving then going way up and then I dropped it all plus more the following week. I am finally out of the 370's which I never thought I would be. I am hoping to blow through the 360's quickly. I have set my goal to celebrate the new year under 300 pounds. I know its a long way for me but I am motivated. Well the 5K that I have been training for since early spring is coming up this Saturday August 15th at Lake Zorinsky. I am at the point in my interval training that I am running for 15 minutes and walking only 5 minutes then back to running for 15 minutes. I hope to have before and after pictures of me at the 5k, it will be the after pictures that will be interesting. Cheer me on say some good words, maybe a prayer. Also this week we had a wellness clinic at work. I was measured. When I started on my journey I was 60 inches at my waist, now I am at 53 inches. All my blood work chlolestral, glucose came back good. I am proud about that. Keep watching for update post 5K and picture. It will be good.


Week 1 initial weigh in 422 lbs
Week 2 weight: 416.4 lbs down 5.6
Week 3 Weight: 416.2 lbs down 5.8
Week 4 Weight: 410 lbs down 12
Week 5 Weight: 405 lbs down 17
Week 6 Weight 403.8 lbs down 18.2
Week 7 Weight 396 lbs down 26
Week 8 Weight 389.8 lbs down 32.2
Week 9 Weight 392.6 lbs up 2.8 loss 29.4
Week 10 Weight 388.8 lbs down 33.2
Week 11 Weight 383.6 lbs down 38.4
Week 12 Weight 383 lbs down 39
Week 13 Free pass
Week 14 Weight 376.4 lbs down 45.6
Week 15 Weight 376.4 lbs down 45.6 at least I didn't gain
Week 16 Weight 375.0 lbs down 47.0 it's moving
Week 17 Weight 377.4 lbs down 44.6 wrong way damn
Week 18 Weight 384.4 lbs down 37.6 what the hell?
Week 19 Weight 370.6 lbs down 51.4 made up over 50 lbs done yahoo!
Week 20 Weight 368.4 lbs down 53.6 never thought I'd get out of the 70's

Why am I mad?

I know my life feels like it's missing something, and I am sure if you ask my wife she would say the same thing. I'm talking about a child. I get upset a lot but try to not let it show. We were at a family dinner Sunday and all the people our age had babies and big deal was made of with announcements, I could not hold a tear back. I get sick of my mother in law talking about her relatives in California and the baby Liberty, how does she think that makes me feel. Everytime my wife gets on the Internet to talk with friends some on else is pregnant and she is not. She feels down and then I feel even worse. We would be great parents. Yes, I may sound a little mad right now but that is because I am. My wife deserves better and so do I. I'm sick of having to fight for everything in my life. All my life I have always put every one else first. Well, damn it I'm going to be first for once. If this post makes me sound like an asshole to somebody that's fine, I don't care. This is my life. I would also like to say to all those people out there that open your legs and pop out kids and live off my hard earn money: FUCK OFF!!! Get job!!!! I'm done supporting you. I want you all to know my balls may not work right and I may not be able to father a child. But do remember this I do have balls, and I would be a better father than many of those out there. So now you know why I am mad at the world, there is more and if you want a good laugh, good conversation piece, discuss topics I suggest you become a friend to my blog subscribe its free. This is only the beginning I have a lot to get off my chest and put out there.........Check back soon.

Update

Well its been long road to recovery. Fighting a collapsed lung that's a pain. I am going to keep this short for now. Weeks 13 and 14 weigh ins. Week 13 used my free no weigh in pass due to having surgery the previous day. This week, week 14 I dropped 6.6lbs weighing in a 376.4 lbs. I dropped my jaw. I earned my 10% body weight loss award. I aiming for another 10%. I am doing to try and add some pictures to this post, they are of me at 383 lbs wearing 3xl Old Navy shirt and size 54 jeans remember I started Weight Watchers the first time I was at 436.6 lbs, size 60 paints, 5XL shirt.

Week 1 initial weigh in 422 lbs
Week 2 weight: 416.4 lbs down 5.6
Week 3 Weight: 416.2 lbs down 5.8
Week 4 Weight: 410 lbs down 12
Week 5 Weight: 405 lbs down 17
Week 6 Weight 403.8 lbs down 18.2
Week 7 Weight 396 lbs down 26
Week 8 Weight 389.8 lbs down 32.2
Week 9 Weight 392.6 lbs up 2.8 loss 29.4
Week 10 Weight 388.8 lbs down 33.2
Week 11 Weight 383.6 lbs down 38.4
Week 12 Weight 383 lbs down 39
Week 13 Free pass
Week 14 Weight 376.4 lbs down 45.6

My life

Coming off my anniversary week, we know what happens at times like that but that week I still dropped 5+ pounds. This week was another of those weeks. I had a good week. The day before weigh in is my wifes birthday. I treat her nice take her to a winery. Take her to a nice french resturant in Lincoln Nebraska called "The Green Gateau." Anyone wondering Gateau means cake in French. And for us it means more wine with dinner. The meals were wonderful. The Lobster Bisc soup was to die for. I do not want to think how many points this meal was a lone. My wife had the Green Gateau for desert she shared, I was just going to have a nice glass of sherry for desert, but she shared. The smell of my sherry about made her sick, sorry baby but it was good. Took her home and ...... well that was the end of that. Today went to see the surgeon and found out all my pain is from a bad gallbladder. The test they ran says when your gallbladder hits 30% it needs to come out mine was at 20% it really needs to come out. Surgery is Tuesday I am really scared. Then I had to see my primary doctor who realized I say him right before Memorial day and now today I was down 9 pounds started to get really worried saying your sicker than we thought. I said no doc I am a Weight Watcher and it really helps. I have been eating with little pains. He told me I made a believer out of him that Weight Watchers does work. So to weigh in tonight after the last 48 hours I am glad I did not gain I weighed in at an even 383 down 0.6 pounds. Well theres my week in a wrap up. I hope yours go better. Talk to you all later.

Week 1 initial weigh in 422 lbs
Week 2 weight: 416.4 lbs down 5.6
Week 3 Weight: 416.2 lbs down 5.8
Week 4 Weight: 410 lbs down 12
Week 5 Weight: 405 lbs down 17
Week 6 Weight 403.8 lbs down 18.2
Week 7 Weight 396 lbs down 26
Week 8 Weight 389.8 lbs down 32.2
Week 9 Weight 392.6 lbs up 2.8 loss 29.4
Week 10 Weight 388.8 lbs down 33.2
Week 11 Weight 383.6 lbs down 38.4
Week 12 Weight 383 lbs down 39

Well, I just realized I have not been keeping up on my weight loss journey. Here is an update starting at week 8 were I left off. Week 8 I was down 6.2 weighing in at 389.8 lbs. The following week was not good I had problems getting motivated and have been fighting my gallbladder and did not have much activity this week so for week 8 I was up 2.8 lbs weighing in at 392.6 lbs. No fear though I made a come back in week 10. Week 10 I was down 3.8 lbs loosing what I had gained and an extra pound weighing in 388.8 lbs. Now for this week. I have been back on my training schedule for the 5K. I did a 5K right before weigh in. This week weigh in results down 5.2 lbs weighed 383.6 lbs. I am making the come back I need. I can not wait to see the surgeon on the 10th I think once my gall bladder is out I will feel a lot better. Look at my chart:

Week 1 initial weigh in 422 lbs
Week 2 weight: 416.4 lbs down 5.6
Week 3 Weight: 416.2 lbs down 5.8
Week 4 Weight: 410 lbs down 12
Week 5 Weight: 405 lbs down 17
Week 6 Weight 403.8 lbs down 18.2
Week 7 Weight 396 lbs down 26
Week 8 Weight 389.8 lbs down 32.2
Week 9 Weight 392.6 lbs up 2.8 loss 29.4
Week 10 Weight 388.8 lbs down 33.2
Week 11 Weight 383.6 lbs down 38.4